Hmmm, I guess I'm extremely biased against any language where the
basic syntax itself requires words longer than 4 characters and consists
of entire sentences
I can now see why you stated you were a "2-time restarter (loser !!)" when it came to learning at college. You really never truly learned COBOL, nor used it on a regular basis while being employed. One can use words that are 4 characters or less, and you do not need to have entire sentences. Until you actually learn something and really use it, you should not talk about it as if you did know it.
At least I am when the structure of the language forces the run-time machine code
to jump through hoops e.g. performing 200 operations where 20 or 30 would do if it
were written in pure assembler.
That usually only happens when somebody does not know what they are doing when coding with COBOL. Which, as you already implied, you really never got to learn and use. Granted it is not as efficient as Assembler, but neither is C or any other language. COBOL was not meant to be the most efficient, and many other languages meet that criteria as well. It was meant to make it easy for most anybody to learn and use. Whether they were capable of learning it enough to use it more efficiently is another matter.
I guess I'm most biased against SQL because Microsoft consistently broke the
ODBC support for Macromedia Authorware with every update of Win95, 98 and Me.
Though I guess here Microsoft and Adobe are the real culprits rather than SQL itself !
Microsoft's SQL software, which is their RDBMS server, is based upon the SQL language. It is not the true SQL language. But as we all should know by now, Microsoft and other large companies (like Adobe) think they can do whatever they so desire, which means trying to set the standard in their own image (kind of like having a GOD complex).
I have used SQL with many RDBMS software distributions, and for many years. I even teach classes in how to use SQL. I am willing to compare my knowledge and experience with both COBOL and SQL against yours any day.